


After Tonight

by MiniMiney_Mo



Category: Original Work
Genre: Break Up, Character Study, F/F, Heartbreak, Hopeful Ending, Implied Sexual Content, Lesbian Character of Color, Lesbian Sex, Making Love, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-22
Updated: 2020-03-22
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:40:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23253358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiniMiney_Mo/pseuds/MiniMiney_Mo
Summary: I didn't know what it was exactly that hurt. Her words? Her absence? Her utter lack of care for my feelings? My deceived expectations? I didn't know but it was there and it was real, like a branding iron upon my epidermis or a needle in my veins. She'd marked me like cattle and had grown in my core like a poison, ready to own and kill from the inside.And I had let her.
Relationships: Original Female Character/Original Female Character
Kudos: 5





	After Tonight

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! So... This is the first lesbian romance (kind of) that I'm posting but also the first time I'm posting anything close to smut, too. I wanna apologize in advance if it's bad, haha. I kinda just... went with the flow lol :')
> 
> Anyway. For better immersion, I'd recommend you listen to one of the songs listed below as they all helped me set the tone of this one-shot.
> 
> After Tonight - Justin Nozuka  
> Put It Straight - (G)-Idle  
> Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word - Elton John  
> Memory - Barbara Streisand
> 
> Please, enjoy! :)

"Why did you leave?" I asked in the darkness, my voice no higher than a hesitant whisper.

I felt the body above mine tense and a huff - or maybe it was a laugh- against my skin and the lips on my neck spread in a slight smirk. What was so funny in my sadness that would make her smirk as if I were merely being a petulant child?  
Her hands on my hips squeezed the bit of fat there while she brushed her lips all over my skin, probably seeking an answer even she did not have.

Was I angry? Yeah, I was. But did I love her? Heck if I did -too much, even. And I missed her, so much.

I needed her. I wanted her. Burned for her. My whole being craved her.

"There was nothing left for me, here. I needed to go, see something else." she eventually whispered back, still leaving light kisses on my collarbone.

My legs wrapped around her waist and my left hand descended on the small of her back, gliding on her supple, caramel skin and stopping a bit above the cleft of her bottom. Oh, how I wanted to touch it and have her whimper for more, making her feel that pit of want and need I had been feeling for months. 

"What about me? Was I not a reason to stay?" I sighed out now breathless from her ministrations. Her lips had found my breasts and she was now gently nibbling on my nipples while one of her hands went to caress my lower lips. My breathing was becoming erratic and a low moan escaped my mouth. I could feel myself thrust my hips up in vain, knowing she wouldn't give me what I desired any time soon. 

Again, a grin split her lips and her fringe fell before her eye. Her hair used to be a lot longer, I noticed. It used to cascade down her back and she'd often ask me to braid it - it felt like ages ago, to speak honestly. Her cropped hair suited her well though. Made her look like a goddess, her power leaking through each of her moves. 

"You know I love you, right? Always have and always will?"  
"But I was not enough, is that it?" I bit back. 

She swirled a tongue around my nipple. 

"It's not like that, I swear. I told you: I needed to go away, discover new sceneries, see something else. I love you but I needed more space. I didn't betray you though. I'm a faithful woman, ya know?" she smiled arrogantly. Not an ounce of regret in her voice, an utter disregard for what we had, for us as a whole... For me. 

Tears were now stinging my eyes but I knew she could not see them, would not see them, too busy swimming in her own pride and smugness as she was. Truly, I loved her. Too much, unfortunately.

And it hurt. I didn't know what it was exactly that hurt. Her words? Her absence? Her utter lack of care for my feelings? My deceived expectations? I didn't know but it was there and it was real, like a branding iron upon my epidermis or a needle in my veins. She'd marked me like cattle and had grown in my core like a poison, ready to own and kill from the inside. 

And I had let her. 

Biting my bottom lip, I took a decision. Probably one of the hardest decisions but was love ever painless? It didn't seem like it. 

"After tonight." Her mouth on my saliva-drenched breast and the finger against my soaking womanhood, both stilled and her gaze met mine, eyes that I knew to be the color of the whiskey we'd drink after a long day at work now drowned in the darkness and possibly tinted in lust and wonder.

"After tonight," I repeated "I want you to leave. For good. Never think of coming back again. You cannot expect me to let you walk all over me as you please. When I wake up tomorrow, you'll be long gone."

Her shoulders slumped and a disappointed - dare I say, bitter - shudder shook her body. I felt her forehead come to rest on my plexus while her hands kneaded my sides, as she would do to comfort me when I (rightfully, I now knew) doubted her and her affection. How long had she pretended? Had any of this been real? 

I braced myself, in wait of a contestation, an attempt at convincing me to take her back, let her march into my life again and saccage everything one more time. 

None of this came, though. Instead... 

"Okay" she sighed remorsefully. "Okay. I'm going tomorrow morning. But I was sincere: I have always loved you and always will."

"No, you loved me. That's different."

She bit her lip, incapable of looking at me in the eye. But why did it matter? I no longer expected honesty from her, nor did I want it. I was still burning with desire and want for her anyway. That was I all wanted. 

So I grabbed her face and brought it towards mine, our lips joining in a slow, searing kiss, gently moving against one another, tongues brushing, entangling and it reignited something in her as she started rolling her hips against mine like a thirsty man would run to the first river he came across. 

She was starved, oh so desperate for my touch, desperate to have me one last time. 

I spread my legs a little bit more and she became frantic, trying to reach every inch of skin available on my body, as if to memorize my every curve, crease and angle, feasting one last time on my very being.

From then on, no more words were exchanged. Only moans, whimpers, sighs, groans, screams could be heard between the two of us. It was hard and fast, slow and intense, long and painful, all at the same time, overwhelming for each of our senses, a tangle of limbs, a blur of sensation. We made love as we never had before. 

By the time we were finished, we were both covered in each other's fluids, sticky but content, barely a pinch in our hearts for what was to come. Too tired to move, we fell asleep filthy, breathless, my head on her chest and her fingers skimming the curve of my waist. I did not cry, she did not say "goodnight" or "goobye", we simply closed our eyes and let each other go. 

When I woke up the following day, she wasn't there anymore. Long gone, as promised. Against my own expectations, I was only relieved and content, a tinge of melancholy and regret still weighing on my heart and the ghost of her caresses gliding against my flesh like a mere draught. Still, none of these was close to the despair or heart-shattering sorrow I had expected to feel last night. 

She was gone and I was surprisingly ready to walk my own path.


End file.
